Monday, April 21, 2008

Talking to teens...

You know... I seem to have no problem making a connection with other people's high school kids. Not to brag, but I get incredible feedback from the medical community and parents regarding my ability to make change in their patients/child's lives.

Yet, I am ready to ship my own son off to boarding school... scratch that... military school. The boy just can't think outside himself. He is a FANTASTIC student (A average)... He is a bright kid (read smart ass that gets his dad's goat. Fu"ing genetics {G-pa Petersen here})... When he is kind and considerate there is no one I admire more. Yet... He can't think more than 15 seconds into the future. He thinks only about his next acquisition. What other people have seems so enticing to him. How did I raise such a materialist? His Apple Ipod Touch seems to enjoy more attention than his mother.

Okay.. to be fair... he is at Parent-Teacher-Conference with his mother right now. I refused to go (circumstances today made me furious and I just want to watch him squirm while he can't: watch my TV, enjoy my food, and use MY internet). Why? I really won't say. Not out of secrecy, but out of privacy. He has the right NOT to have people know how dumb he acts (at times). Now, uncle Shane would be telling his dad that he needs to relax, and that the lessons that will change his behavior will come, as they have for all of us, through the natural environment. To Shane I say, "I hate it when you speak sense. Please stop it."

In all, he's a great kid. I just need a hug perhaps. My parents warned me about teenagers. Too bad they did it when I, myself, was actually a teen (brain damaged).
How do I be his "bud" and be his "teacher" at the same time? I guess my own advice may come in handy here. "Your role is to be a parent, not a friend. That is what you chose." Damnit!

I want to wrap him up, and kick his ass, all in the same moment. 18 just will NOT come soon enough. As bright as I am, and as skilled with "others" kids, why can't I get it right?

F*ing reality. Perhaps I need religion to give me solace. No... I just can't delude myself that much.



;)
HH

4 comments:

shane said...

Ask Ang to tell you about all the stupid things I did as a teenager. And look how I turned out? Oh, wait, I'm supposed to be helping. Sorry.

spontaneous expressions said...

ohhhh man you just gave me a glimpse into my future (only a few years away now). I thought raising toddlers was hard, I can't even begin to relate to parenting teenagers. Actually, I heard somewhere that kids go through a similar process in adolescence that they do in their terrible twos. Something about getting their own identity or whatever... Next thing you know you'll catch him hiding a bible under his mattress. It wasn't mine I swear dad, I was just holding it for a friend.

Hang in there! I suspect you'll both survive this!!! From what I've heard he is a great kid.

Lisa said...

Aw. Here is your hug. (((HH)))

Counterintuitive said...

My teenage son has been remarkably easy (considerate, helpful, still hangs out with us) his first few months of teenagerdom but, of course, that makes me nervous--the calm before the storm.

Love love SE's comment about the hidden bible. Please report if any such rebelliousness occurs.